The Elections

I am not going to go into the campaign or anything here. There is certainly enough of that going around. What has me writing today is the man who stopped by knocking on my apartment door (what ever happened to a secured building? Seriously.)

A gentleman canvassing for the Liberal party showed up this afternoon. Thinking the knock was the mailman with a package for me I answered without hesitation. I very much wish I'd used the peephole.

He handed me a card to Re-Elect John McKay. The local runner. Married to Carolyn Dartnell with five children (Five? Uhm.. Catholic? Or maybe just too much money and time on his hands). Running in the same riding he's lived in his whole life. Former Moderator of the Spring Garden Church. Chair of the National Parliamentary Prayer Breakfast. And contributor to the book Divorcing Marriage: Unveiling the Dangers in Canada’s New Social Experiments. A book on the effects of Gay-Marriage on society. Now I'm going to go off on a side tangent right here just on this book.

Divorcing Marriage: Unveiling the Dangers in Canada’s New Social Experiments:

From “the Foreword”
by Maggie Gallagher, co-author of The Case for Marriage and syndicated columnist

“Same-sex marriage will be, in effect, a public and legal declaration by governments that children do not need mothers and fathers. That alternative family forms are not only just as good, they are just the same as a husband and wife bringing kids up together.” pg vii

“Marriage is our most basic social institution for protecting children. Same-sex marriage amounts to a vast social experiment on children. Rewriting the basic rules of marriage puts all children, not just the children in unisex unions, at risk. Do not expect boys to become good family men in a society of [males] who believe, as they have been taught, that men are optional in family life.” pg viii-ix

Err.. uhm... Pardon me? Now, to be fair, the parts by John McKay are not that bad. However, just the fact that he contributed to the book makes me not want to vote for him.

From “Confusion on the Hill”
by John McKay, Parliamentary Secretary for Finance

“We can see now, however, that those who were ringing the alarm bells were not being paranoid. The central objective of ‘gay marriage’ advocates is to see a forced acceptance of their particular view of marriage established into law. They are no longer interested in, or satisfied with, a mere absence of discrimination against those who practice homosexual lifestyles. Rather, they are interested in moving society beyond tolerance to legally entrenched acceptance, if not approval.” Pg 32.

“The confusion on the Hill cannot be settled by the Supreme Court... It will be settled only when Parliament works together with the citizenry it represents to find a solution to the same-sex marriage debate that truly accommodates profound differences of opinion, while determining what best makes for the common good.” Pg 37-38.

Okay.. now ignoring the obvious flaws of this local candidate for which the person at my door would not realize I would see, the attitude of the canvasser left something to be desired. He asked if the Liberals could count on my vote. Now not wanting to be preached at because of saying no, I said I had yet to fully decide. I pointed out that I am generally a Green supporter (though, with Elizabeth May as the leader they also leave something to be desired). His response was to tell me if I wanted my vote to count (ouch) to vote Liberal if I didn't want Harper in power. Now I never said I didn't want Harper in power.

Now that "vote counting" thing had me very close to slamming the door in his face. The "vote to make sure the person you don't like isn't in power" fad of Canadian politics is one of the major flaws with our current governments. This is how we've been deciding who is in power. We do not vote because someone would make a great leader. No, no. That makes sense. We vote because the previous one pissed us off somehow and the only way to get rid of them is to vote for the second leading party. We vote purely in a manner so that we constantly have something to complain about (especially when you're voting NDP or Green).

I did not close the door in the man's face. I humoured him for a moment while he tried to explain that even Elizabeth May of the Green Party would want me to vote Liberal because, since there is no strong Green candidate in my riding, that would ensure someone she's all buddy-buddy with gets in if she can't. At this point I'm actually feeling a little nauseous at our political system. I decide to point out that I am moving at the end of October (a couple weeks after the voting period) so the candidate in my riding is not really of any concern to me. I will be voting purely on party, not local, politics. Apparently this is a foreign concept.

Women and Body Image

Now, I am a female so at times I have issues with how I look. I, however, realize that I'm being neurotic and just ignore it. I don't mean to say I'll let myself get fat and just ignore it because that's being neurotic. I can tell the difference between my "Does this dress make me look fat?" moment and the "The scale must be wrong, I can't possibly be 150lbs" moment. That being said, for the majority of time I am quite happy with how I look currently. I have been both ends of the spectrum. I've been very thin and I have been chubby (yes ladies and germs this cute little elfling did actually reach the 150lbs mark. For your own health never work with a bunch of motherly women who always think you don't eat enough and make it really easy to access cookies and chocolate.)

Having been on both sides I have very odd mental issues (yes. Too easy, move along now). I never think I'm eating enough (thanks to people thinking I was anorexic when I was younger) and at the same time I feel the need to check the nutritional info on the back of treats -after- I've eaten them and then tell myself I really need to work that off (which, I of course, rarely actually do.) Now again, I realize this is me being dumb. No one else even picks up on the fact that I do it. I am healthy, active, "energetic". So, why did I come home from the gym feeling fat last night?

I went in for a fitness assessment (they made me. Without it I don't get my membership card) yesterday. I haven't been to the gym in a month due to work and I wasn't feel 100% so it's not surprising my results weren't great. What stood out though was the Fat Percentage Test. She pressed this machine against my arm in two spots and pronounced that I have 32.5% body fat. According to charts, that makes me Obese. She even went as far as to tell me that, at 121lbs, I'm at risk of diabetes, high blood pressure, the works (one would think, if this were true, my doctors would be pointing this out). At this point I'm sitting there looking at her and wanting out. I'm sorry. There is no way at 121lbs with a 26inch waist I'm obese. I have a perfect hip to waist ratio, I'm moderately active and my eating habits (excuse the chocolate gelato in my freezer) are to the point where everyone comments on how healthy I am.

Yet, sitting there, knowing all this is just an attempt to make me pay for supplements and a personal trainer, I am still feeling fat. Now, thinking about it the next day, I like my fat. She wants me to lose enough fat so that if I didn't replace it with muscle I'd be 105lbs. I've been 105lbs. You know what a girl is missing at 105lbs? Breasts. I like having breasts. At my "obese" level I'm at now I'm not exactly well endowed (stop staring).

I did a Body Fat Calculator online this morning that takes into consideration my measurements, not whatever that machine took into consideration. It's, apparently, the same way the US military uses (or Navy, or something like that). It told me I have 20% body fat. Perfectly perfect for a woman. I'm not in amazing physical shape, but I'm healthy. Duh?

Now, this was a -really- long opening to the whole point here. This is not really about me but about the female condition.

The above example is why we are all so bloody neurotic. We have so many mixed messages. We need to be curvy and busty but at the same time have no body fat. How realistic is that? No wonder so many girls think they need breast implants. And you constantly (or maybe this is just me) have the boyfriends going "You are gorgeous",etc and then spend the rest of their time oggling some girl who looks -nothing- like you. You have pretty blonde bimbos trying to tell young girls it's okay to be yourself but really, how do you believe a gorgeous person who says that? Of course it's okay for -them- to be themselves. So you have all these beautiful and healthy "average" women beating themselves up all the time to be "perfect".

On the other side there are a number of unhealthily fat women who try to convince the world that it's okay to be themselves. I am sorry, yes, you have large breasts but come on. If you can't see your own toes you need to lose weight. We cannot all be a size 2 but you know, size 22 is a little much. It is not good for your body, unless of course you like not being able to take stairs and want to die at 50. Stop pretending you are happy being fat. You aren't. That's one of the reasons you're fat. (Yes. This is politically incorrect. Bite me.)

Oh and for all you size 0s out there. Eat a piece of cake already. 5'7" and 100lbs is -creepy-. You remind me of a poster in my high school fashion class with a model next to a starving African girl. Looking like a starving boy is not pretty either. If you thighs are the size of my bicep... you need help. The fashion industry is fucking with your head. Carbs are yummy...

And BOYS stop liking a girl cause you're expected too. You do not help.

Rules to Live By.

These will slowly be added too every little while... but I think it's high time this was put in writing. Now up from 25 to 40 thanks to a trip to the movies. 1480 words. Warning: May offend those it was directed to. If you are offended my apologies and I suggest you reevaluate yourself.........

1) You are not the centre of the universe. The rest of us probably don't even notice you when you're not screaming for attention.........

2) Your children are not adorable. They are not angels. The sooner you realize that the sooner you'll discipline them so they aren't tiny monsters. If you don't do it now the law will have to do it for you when they're older.

3) Headphones were invented for a reason. Use them. I have no use for your music and don't enjoy having to deafen myself to block it out.

4) It takes years to teach you the English language. It shouldn't take you a minute to butcher it. "Axed" means "To chop or fell with or as if with an ax" not "To put a question to" the word you mean to use is "Asked".

5) Just because you have the IQ of a gnat does not mean the rest of us do. We are not required to dumb ourselves down because you can't be bothered to try and understand.

6) You cannot judge a book by its cover.

7) I am not required to follow your religious doctrine. Nor are you required to follow mine. I am not less of a person purely because my holiday comes before your celebration.

8) Tolerance and patience are a must, but they can be worn out. Tread lightly and don't abuse those who are patient with you.

9) Do not expect the natives of a country to assimilate to your desires. You need to assimilate to the country you live in. If you do not want to learn the language and social etiquette of your new home, you should have stayed where you were.

10) We do not leave the "village" to raise our children. I do not want to have someone's offspring invading my privacy because the parents believe putting them in the hallway and ignoring them is parenting.

11) You cannot blame Media for how your child turns out. If you do not have the ability to raise a child and leave it up to the television and music that is no one's fault but your's.

12) The world is not here for you alone. Show some courtesy and keep it clean. We don't appreciate tramping through your garbage, stepping on your gum or kicking your discarded beer bottles

13) Driving is not a right. It's a privilege. Learn to do it or get off the road before you kill someone.

14) Just because you're pretty doesn't mean you are entitled to more than the rest of us. The fact that you think that means you are actually entitled to less.

15) We do not all pay attention to pop culture. Celebrities are simply people too. The fact that you need to delve into their lives because your's is so unfortunate is just sad.

16) The fact that you want to smoke should not impact me. I do not want to gag while walking inside a building because you don't want to walk to the designated area because you think it's your right to infringe on my right to clean air.

17) If you can smell your perfume you are wearing too much. The rest of us are being nauseated. Scent should be subtle and light. If you need that much try taking a shower.

18) We were blessed with the invention of antiperspirant and deodorant for a reason. Find some. Use it.

19) The fact that you are fat is no one's fault but your own. The world does not need to change to accommodate you. If you end up partially on my lap on the bus when you sit down, do us both a favour... eat a salad and take a nice long walk. Remember what your toes look like? No? Maybe you should rediscover what it's like to be able to tie your shoes.

20) A person's sexuality does not affect you in any way. Just because they're gay does not mean they want you. And even if they do, you're not...right? Or is that what really bothers you?

21) Lesbians and bisexual women are not there for the amusement of men. Life is not a porn movie.

22) People who work in a position that serves you deserve respect. Smile at your bus driver and say thank you to your waitress.

23) Skin colour is nothing but an excuse to segregate society by choice. What difference does the amount of brown in your make? It doesn't change your intelligence or dreams. Get over it.

24) Stupidity is not an excuse. It can be fixed. Only you can be blamed for your lack of knowledge.

25) Just because someone is pretty does not mean they deserve cat-calls and pet names. They aren't appreciated. How would you feel if you or your daughter or wife were treated like that? Yeah. That's what I thought.....

26) Just because you can ignore your bastard child's screaming does not mean the rest of us can. I decided not to have children for a reason and just because you had a child while you were still one does not mean you shouldn't act like a parent.....

27) Do not doom your child to a life of obesity because you are lazy and fat. You do not like being fat and useless. When you have a child, try feeding them right and encouraging them to get exercise so they do not turn out as disgusting as you are. Burger King is not a suitable meal for anyone, let alone a four year old.....

28) If it is crowded and you cannot take the stairs at anything more than one every minute, and there is an elevator or escalator, use the modes of transportation that are there specifically for people who can't take stairs. Do not inconvenience the rest of us who want to get somewhere within the hour.....

29) The subway station is not a huge garbage can. It is disgusting to walk up to a platform and see it covered in paper, drink containers and discarded McDonalds wrapping. I know you are self absorbed but how would you feel having to walk on someone else's discarded lunch?....

30) If there is already one or two strollers on the bus, don't try to fit your's on it as well. For every stroller on the bus you could fit three people. You've now prevented nine people from being able to get where they want to go. You chose to have a child. Deal with the consequences. ....

31) If you need to stop to ask a question when getting on a bus, going through a booth, etc, and there are twenty people behind you, get on last. Do not force your way to the front of the line and then proceed to prevent anyone else from moving forward.....

32) Get off your damn phone. ....

33) Humans have this really neat thing called peripheral vision. Use it. If you feel the need to stare at something as you walk through a public place how about you also learn to watch out for people walking in your direction. Do not act surprised when you nearly walk into someone. When you are looking anywhere but in front of you it is really hard for the rest of world to tell where you're going.....

34) Cats are house pets. If I see your feline wandering around outside repeatedly with no collar and looking scruffy, I am taking them home and showing them the love you obviously do not. Do you know what happens to cats outside in huge cities?....

35) Just because you are thin does not mean you are fit. If you do no exercise you may be as out of shape as someone who is chunky, you were just blessed with a high metabolism or you just don't eat much.....

36) My chair is not a foot rest. There is plenty of foot room. I do not feel like being rocked back and forth because you are restless.....

37) If the movie is over and everyone is clearing out, do not force your away back into the theatre. Wait until everyone has left if you have to go back in you inconsiderate git.....

38) If you are in a long line waiting to purchase something, have your damn money out before you reach the front of the line. How much thought does that actually take?....

39) Do not stand right in front of doors. If I hit you, it is your fault.

40) Do not push children. I cannot believe I have to even say that, but apparently I do.

41) You are not meant to be a blonde. If no one in your race has blonde hair naturally, you are not meant to be a blonde. It looks bad on you. Indians are not meant to be blondes, especially when it turns out more orange than blonde. Italians are not meant to be blondes. Africans are -not- meant to be blonde. Need I continue the list?

42) Bras are suppose to be worn under your clothing. Perhaps your mother failed to instruct you in the fact that a bra should not cover more of your breasts than your shirt does. If your shirt does not completely cover your breasts, you need a bigger shirt. Stop trying to convince yourself you are a size small.

43) Underwear is called that for a reason. I do not want to see your thong or boxers.